It’s really hard to be on social media, but don’t compare yourself to other people. Your body is not as good as it should be, your clothes are outdated, your house is not very modern and special. You may even think that you are not good enough at all.
This is not strange, and almost everyone is excited to see the beautiful and successful life of these people. If left unchecked, we may spend hours during the day and week watching the corners of their lives. The more time we spend in these media, the more and more new information we get about their lifestyles, and this makes us not feel good about ourselves. All of these issues stem from comparing the lives of those people with our own lives.
Comparing takes away the feeling of happiness and mental health from life. If you do not stop comparing yourself to others, you will spend your whole life on your own money or energy rather than just following in their footsteps. In fact, you will have no intellectual independence and decision-making, and your only goal will be to live by the same standards and methods. Comparing can be a game we will never win; So you should definitely try to stop comparing yourself to others on social media.
Where is the root of comparing yourself to others?
In fact, there is a specific biological and biological reason why we compare ourselves to others. Our brain uses a comparison mechanism to measure our position relative to others.
One professor of organizational behavior describes comparison as “one of the most primitive ways in which we know who we are, what we are good at, and what we are weak at.”
Most of the time, these calculations are done in a fraction of a second in the background of our mind and we are not even aware of it. But when we look at only the highlights of people’s lives, this comparison can quickly become poisonous and destructive. Man is a social being and enjoys connecting with others and belonging to communities, but we constantly compare ourselves to others, putting our happiness, mental health and self-confidence at risk.
What are the effects of comparing yourself to others in real and personal life?
Falling into the trap of comparing yourself to others can have several destructive side effects. If you are a comparator, you have probably experienced some of these problems yourself. However, we will recount some of the most common ones.
- Negative and anxious thoughts that are hard to get out of one’s mind
- Higher rates and likelihood of anxiety and depression
- Excessive and often futile attempts to reach comparative subjects
Numerous studies have shown that people feel worse about themselves after spending time on social media. All of these negative emotions are reflected in your mental health and your bank account. A recent study shows that comparing yourself to others and trying to create a similar lifestyle to people can lead to financial crises. They found that if individual neighborhoods won a lottery ticket, neighbors were more likely to make large, significant purchases. The strange thing is that there is even a possibility that the neighbors will go bankrupt by making these purchases!
These bankruptcies and personal financial crises were 100% preventable. These crises should not be considered as only financial problems, because they have entered other areas of life and affect them as well. People who saw their neighbors’ upgrades, improvements, and lifestyle changes suddenly realized that they needed such a change, and even though they could not afford it, they did.
As long as you have enough financial support and capital, there is nothing wrong with enjoying a luxurious and modern lifestyle. But if you are struggling with a lot of debt to make certain purchases to impress a certain person or people in person or on social media like Instagram, you do not own them, they own you and they have control over you. These debts become more and more and destroy all your income and you suddenly realize that you have spent your whole life achieving things that you thought would make you happy.
With all these explanations, if you think that you also need to stop comparing yourself with others and close your eyes to their lives, in this section we try to introduce some practical tips and solutions that can be used to achieve this goal. -Help you a lot.
This habit can change everything. As a very simple solution, use the notes section of your phone to do this. Write down everything you find in yourself that you enjoy or are proud of, and be thankful. Sometimes these can be very small, sometimes they are big. Review these notes whenever you feel weak.
2- Be grateful and satisfied
Thanksgiving brings you gratitude and satisfaction, so you will be satisfied and happy in whatever situation and environment you are in. In fact, you are happy with yourself, satisfied with your position in life, and not worried about what other people are doing.
Of course, this does not mean that you have no goals or ambitions for the future. After all, you have to live to be a better and more successful person tomorrow than you are today; Therefore, do not think of gratitude and satisfaction in the sense that you do not sit in the corner and do something and still be satisfied with everything. Doing new things and starting new challenges is part of human life. Appreciation and satisfaction means establishing a regular routine for your life and being satisfied with your current situation and not focusing all your attention and satisfaction on achieving anything in the future.
3. Do not compare your life with the most prominent points of other people’s lives
This is perhaps the most important and bizarre part of our list today. Social media does not always reflect reality! Of course, you probably know this yourself, but have you thought about it well?
The image people portray of themselves on social media is often unrealistic and only a selection of the best moments of their lives. The image we have of their lives may not exist at all, and even those people themselves may miss this life. What is published on social media can in no way be considered a real selection of people’s lives.
We spend a lot of energy and money imitating a lifestyle that we think people have and we probably will never be able to achieve. As mentioned, this comparison with others on social media not only affects our mental health, but also the financial stability of our lives.
When you can focus on these issues and focus on your personal life, you will have more control over your income and decisions, and as a result, you will have a better and happier life. Because you do what you really want to do.
4. Focus on your strengths
You can be humble and humble, but still know your strengths, your talents and your achievements. To be humble, you do not have to lower yourself or express yourself less than you really are. In fact, this approach is very wrong and harmful and is one of the biggest dangers of life and the discussion of comparison. The more we compare ourselves to others, the worse we will feel about ourselves. Always try to stay away from this dangerous trap.
Start by writing down 3 things you like about yourself. These can be your strengths. We recommend that you write these in a more descriptive and lengthy manner and do not limit yourself to just a few words. Also, try to be very personal. Let’s write an example for you:
I love people. We may not have been the most popular person in the class at school and I did not have the most friends, but I really enjoy being with other people and people. Knowing this strength will make people who spend time with me realize that I love them and care about them.
5- Rejoice in the happiness and success of others
Constantly comparing ourselves to others makes us unable to feel happy for their success and hard work. In general, it makes us less happy with the achievements of others and we can not celebrate their successes with them.
So consider this challenge: Be happy when a friend tells you something about his or her new job. If someone buys a new home, you will be thrilled with them. When someone shares the good news with you, focus on yourself instead of thinking about yourself. In general, find different ways, big and small, to be happy and celebrate with other people.
Always remember, the success of others does not mean your failure. Their success has nothing to do with you; Therefore, share in their joy, because they have worked hard to achieve this success.
6. Compare yourself to yourself
Instead of comparing yourself to other people, try to compare yourself to yourself. In other words, focus on your goals. For example, what progress have you made over the past year? Compare yourself to your position 5 years ago.
You have probably made a lot of changes during this time. You may have gotten a new job, learned a new skill, or produced a new product over the past year. All of these can be a source of encouragement and happiness. If you think that your achievements are not enough and your situation has not changed enough from the past, it is time to change your behavior and lifestyle so that you can achieve your goals.
7. Limit your use of social media
As mentioned, comparing yourself to others on social media can have devastating effects on your mental health. Limiting your presence on social media can be one way to prevent and avoid these comparisons. You can use the following methods to impose more restrictions on your presence on social media:
- Do not follow people and users who make you feel bad about yourself.
- Limit the time you use social media. For example, take 15 minutes, set aside your cell phone when that 15 minutes are up.
- Turn off your cell phone while spending time with friends and family. Being present and fully focused in the present makes everyone happier.
- Do not oblige yourself to respond to all comments and messages. Not everyone is going to have enough time to do these things.
- When you find yourself so addicted to social media, ask yourself why? Are you bored or are you looking for confirmation? What better thing can you do instead?
8. Stay away from social media
Experienced counselors and psychologists say that it is impossible to always pay attention to other people’s lives and at the same time be able to be satisfied with your own life.
If you can not be satisfied with what you have and your life, and showing other people’s lives on social media always distracts you, it may be best to stay away from this environment for a while.
So, as a last resort, consider this challenge: Stop being on all social media for a while. Even cancel emails received from these networks so that you do not notice what is happening at this time.
Spend your time and energy on your real possessions. Look out for friends, family, home, work and everything else that matters to you. Look for things in your life that others may be jealous of. Remember, people look at each other on social media. This means that many people are likely to compare themselves to what you have. Try to find these things, be grateful and grateful for their existence, and try to enjoy having them more.
Do you have trouble comparing yourself to others?
After reading this article, you may have wondered if this problem affects me as well. To find out if you’re also struggling with this problem, answer these questions:
- Have you ever bought something instantly and emotionally from Instagram?
- Have you ever had FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) or anxiety after surfing social media?
- When something good happens to someone else, is it your natural reaction to get upset?
- Have you ever deleted anything from social media because you did not get good feedback?
- How many times during the day do you check the list of people who have watched the story on Instagram? Or do you see the list of people who liked it?
If you answered “yes” to some of the following questions, you are probably comparing yourself to other people on social media to some extent, and you care more about people in this environment than is necessary and sufficient.